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I'm not quite sure how to approach this subject so I'm just going to come out and say what I need from you. First, you can't say anything about meeting with me today, and second, don't be offended by what I am about to do. You see, if you're going to be my stepson-in-law I have to know for sure that you are capable of giving my stepdaughter superb sperm so that I can have beautiful offspring. I want lots of them. I've already taken my stepdaughter in for a full exam and she is in top physical form. In order for me to find out what condition your sperm is in, I must retrieve a sample from you to take to my doctor. I couldn't just come out and ask you to give me a sample of your semen. How would I know for sure you were handing me your spunk unless I cranked it out myself? Which is what I intend to do.
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