You are not able to become hard. You keep trying to deny this pitiful fact, but you are stuck with it; it's the truth of your circumstances. There is no amount of denial or justification that can change the fact that you are an impotent loser. Is that not the reason you're here? You know deep down that you need assistance, but you're at a loss for where to turn. You've come to me, and I will assist you in the only way I know how: by making you feel inferior and ashamed of yourself until you beg to be released from the curse you are carrying about.